Things I have learnt in Chennai…
Posted on July 15th, 2007 by Niket
- That when you answer the phone, the correct salutation is not “hello” but “tell me.” No, I am not talking about Tamil salutation, that is literally the English salutation.
- That you have to exchange sweat with the person in front of you in a queue, else it will be assumed that you are not standing in the queue but waiting to decide on your order.
- That in any queue, there will be an amma standing in front of you who will refuse to move even if the queue moves. But she will perfectly remember the gentleman who came just before her. Meanwhile, due to the rule above, additional individuals will join the queue in front of her. So, when the gentleman just before her is done, it will be her turn. With her gone, you are suddenly sixteenth in the queue, although you were sixth half an hour ago.
- That its OK to start a riot if curds (or curd rice) is not available during a meals. For everything else, “sarr, please adjust.”
- That its never a meal, its always “meals,” even “one meals.” Likewise, its always “curds.”
- That “reserved for women” will always be written in Tamil and you will only be told that you are occupying a reserved seat in Tamil. However, as soon as all the unreserved seats are taken, people will suddenly develop English-speaking skills and you will be informed that the seat you are occupying is reserved. BTW, availability of alternate reserved seat (or lack thereof) is not a criterion for this new-found English speaking ability; the only requirement is unavailability of alternate seating for you.
- That when you share an autorickshaw with strangers, you pay the full fare while your co-riders will pay only their share (eg., for a Rs. 60 ride with two strangers, you pay Rs. 60, the others pay Rs. 20 apiece).
(Please note the category of this post before your Tamizh pride gets hurt.)
[…] Niket, who has recently moved to Chennai, has some observations to share: … [It’s] OK to start a riot if curds (or curd rice) is not available during a meals. For everything else, “sarr, please adjust.” […]
Your last point, about the autos, understates things if anything. The extortionist autos are the single most disgraceful thing about Chennai, compared to all other Indian cities that I’ve been to.
Your other points apply, with local modifications, to the rest of the country too. At least in Chennai if someone squeezes past you in the queue and you say “excuse me, I’m here”, he says “sorry”. In Delhi a fight would ensue.
I would strongly agree with you on the auto scenario, and most autowallahs can speak english, telugu or someother language in addition to tamil. However they prefer to speak in tamil till you pay the fare, ensuring that you dont haggle ot argue for the other guy not splitting with you.
once the meter is up, he’ll greet you with a ‘great day’, or a ‘enjoy cheyandi’…..
Hahaha, good post. The part about the ‘amma’ in the queue is so true. And take my advice, do not ever try to argue with this lady. I have tried…and failed miserably. Oh, but she irritates me every time.
Rahul,
All these observations actually point to change in my perspective after staying for 8 years in the US.
It isn’t that I hadn’t experienced these things before… after all, I stayed in India for the first 21 years of my life. Just that I am observing the same situation in a different light. So, these are not complaints, but merely observations (written in a slightly exaggerated fashion :-)).
Although I wish autos were more like that in Mumbai, I don’t mind it too much.
Its funny that I spent Rs. 700 on a meal at Park Sheraton, but was unwilling to pay Rs. 60 for an auto that I knew really ought to charge me Rs. 50 or less.
It would be disgraceful if the auto-driver knows that someone has an emergency (eg., stroke / heart attack or a woman alone in a deserted place at night) and use that to extort money. But trying to wrest an extra 10 - 20 bucks from someone who could very well wait for the next auto that carges appropriate fare would hardly be called “disgraceful” in my view.
The phone conversation starting with “Tell me” is great! Funny, it doesnt seem so odd in Tamil (”sollunga” )
The autorickhaws are horrible in chennai (One autorickshaw driver even became a serial killer). Taxis are not much better either, especially when they say it is AC and charge you three times higher..
Quite amusing. I guess if we all have the ability to laugh at our cities like this, there would be a lot less tension around us
Great post. I think the exchanging sweat bit could apply to many places, unfortunately. In Vietnam, you must learn not to feel bad about elbowing old ladies to prevent them from cutting in line lest you never get anything done.